I am obsessed with being efficient.
If I’m going upstairs in my house—for any reason—I pause and scan the room first. What else needs to go up? A glass? A charger? A random sock that somehow made its way downstairs?
Trip optimized.
On the way back down? I’ll grab the laundry.
Efficient. Productive. Harmless.
Right?
But then I started wondering… where does that mindset stop being helpful—and start costing me something?
Because optimizing a trip upstairs is one thing.
Trying to optimize every moment of your life is something else entirely.
We’ve All Done It
You send an email during a meeting.
You half-listen while typing.
You sit on the couch with your laptop open while the TV is on and your family is next to you.
You tell yourself:
If I have to do work, I might as well also spend time with them.
Sounds efficient.
But who actually gets you in that moment?
Work?
Family?
Neither?
The Uncomfortable Truth
Multitasking doesn’t make you more effective—it just splits your attention.
And when your attention is split, your presence disappears.
- You’re not fully contributing in the meeting.
- You’re not fully connecting with your family.
- You’re not even fully finishing the task you’re trying to “get done.”
You’re just… hovering somewhere in between.
Busy. But not present.
Productive. But not fulfilled.
This Isn’t About Perfection
This isn’t about being “good” or “bad.”
It’s not about putting your phone away and becoming some perfectly mindful, always-present human.
This is about being intentional.
There’s a difference between:
- Choosing to knock out a quick email while dinner is in the oven
- vs.
- Living in a constant state of divided attention because it feels more “efficient”
One is a choice.
The other is a habit.
The Shift
For me, the shift started with a simple question:
What deserves my full attention right now?
Not everything does.
But something always does.
And when I choose to give that one thing my full attention—even for a short period of time—everything feels different.
- Conversations feel richer.
- Work gets done faster (ironically)I feel less scattered, less drained, less…behind
What We Lose When We Chase Efficiency
Efficiency isn’t the enemy.
But when efficiency becomes the goal in every moment, we start trading away presence without even realizing it.
And presence?
- That’s where connection happens
- That’s where meaning lives
- That’s where life actually feels like life
A Simple Reminder
So yes—bring the laundry downstairs.
Carry the extra glass upstairs.
Optimize the small things.
But when it comes to your time, your work, your people…
Don’t optimize yourself right out of being present.
A Final Thought
Before you move on to the next thing, pause for a second.
What deserves your full attention right now?
If you’re realizing you’ve been living in that constant state of “half here, half there,” you’re not alone.
Coaching can help you shift that. It’s not about doing less—it’s about becoming more intentional with your energy and how you show up.